Showing posts with label understanding sexual issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label understanding sexual issues. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Understanding your sexual issues and what to do about them

So many people have some form of sexual problem at a point in their lives, but they don’t know who to talk to about them? 

This issue can be in a relationship, marriage or just personal sexual problems that keep an individual from living a healthy sex life. 

Whatever the issues are surrounding sexuality there is help and that can come in the form of seeing a sex counseloror sex coach.  Many times traditional types of therapy will not be the answer for sexual dysfunction.  A sex counselor or coach can be a person who is educated in therapy but also is taught about sexual health issues and human sexuality.

Human sexuality is extremely complex and the reason why, is that sex is a natural part of every human being, but in each person’s upbringing and in society that person is taught how to understand their sexuality, sex drive, and how it’s supposed to be looked upon as “normal” or right.  This is why a simple act of bringing pleasure to oneself can be made to feel shamed upon, looked down upon or told that they are somehow are unholy or not “normal”.

Sexual desire is squelched often times and people hide their true sexual self and this then creates numerous problems for them in relationships where intimacy is involved.  Having a healthy sexual view about oneself and healthy sexual expression to enjoy sex is a part of one’s simple pleasures in life.

As a sex counselor with my clients one of the first questions that a person asks is am I “normal” we talk about is their idea of shame and guilt surrounding their sexuality.  Then we go into some solutions and techniques involved in helping a person to get past their sexual issues and idea of what is normal or healthy for them sexually.  Sex coaching is a way to give information on sexuality and to solve sexual dysfunction in a relationship or a personal life.  One of the biggest mind shifts after seeing a sex counselor for many people is that their sexual issues were not being “normal” are put to rest and acceptance and understating can then take place.  Human sexuality in each person is unique and expressing it and that expression of it is personal to each and every person. 

Monday, February 28, 2011

Married couples who have a sexual tool box

Sex toys vending machineImage via Wikipedia
What is a sexual tool box for married couples you may ask?

This is the box or place, drawer, cabinet, closet, that you keep your stash of toys and goodies that you and your spouse share with each other in the bedroom. I believe that every married couple should have a sexual tool box and they should fill it with their own unique stash of goodies that they have selected just for each other to use together. This sexual tool box does not have to start off with every sexual gadget in the world, in fact it can have no sexual gadgets in it at all, but of course that would not be as fun.

The reason that a sexual tool box is so absolutely wonderful to have as a married couples is it shows that you and your spouse know how to really enjoy each other sexually and have come to the point in your marriage where you feel open enough to try new things. You may ask what goes into a couple’s sexual tool box and of course this would depend on each couple and how long they have had their tool box for. Some couples have fun sex games, sexy outfits, lubricants of course, sex toys if they like, massage oils, erotic novels that can be read together, sexy DVD’s, the sky’s the limit with what couples can put into their sexual tool box. There may even be a few different types of tool boxes for unique occasions during the month.

If you don’t have a sexual tool box in your marriage, there is no need to feel bad about it or that you are missing out and you may even be the type of married couple who just likes to enjoy each other without any additives, but those that want to add a little passion to the sex in the marriage, creating a sexual tool box with your spouse can be a lot of fun. One place to get started is of course with lubrication or other stimulating gels, these are product that as we age almost all married couples will have to purchase at one time or another. The sexual tool box can be filled with lingerie and stocking, sashes and belts, fun bondage accessories and of course there are adult toys. There are all sorts of Vibrators such as the

 Rabbit Vibrators, clitoral vibrator ,  dildo vibrators,  g-spot vibrator, mini vibrators, Toy Friend

The list goes on and on.  Many couples can also get started by getting a lovers beginners kit such as:  Nouveau Lovers Kit, Regard Indiscret , Agent Secret , Lure Shower Seduction and more.

The point of the sexual tool box is that you and your spouse share it together, it is your secret box that you have when you want to add a little spice or passion to the sex play in your marriage. 

  



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Monday, January 31, 2011

Do you think that erotic novels are the same as pornography?



Caricature on "The great epidemic of porn...Image via Wikipedia
How many people think that erotic novels are the same as pornography?


Many times erotic novels are put down or considered smut, but what if those erotic novels could actually help boost the romance in a marriage. Couples who turn toward pornography as a way to boost the sexual desire in the marriage or add some passion to the love making may be let down. The real person who is usually let down by renting a pornographic movie is the woman. Now, if the porno is well written with a story line and made with a woman in mind than that is a diffident story, but if one is scrolling through the television for a quick thrill, then that is going to be very hard to find a porno made for a woman. This is where having a few erotic novels in the toy box with be the perfect addition to some more romantic and passionate sex, especially when it comes to a woman. In one of my many articles I one called MIND SEX and how powerful this can be when a husband can engage his wife’s mind and get her to be in the mood mentally. Reading erotic novels together is one sure way to do this and it leaves all of the guess work out for the husbands. A few great books are recommended below along with a special pick by author Jeannie Ainslie who I interview on blogtalkraido about the difference between erotica and pornography.

This is also a great article to read about it as well
http://www.examiner.com/love-and-marriage-in-los-angeles/using-erotic-novels-to-create-desire-and-passion-your-marriage

To tune into to hear the interview log on to blogtalkraido




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