Reasons why talking about sex is so sexually charged and then considered a sin after marriage?

The reason is because as people we are teased with images, sexy shows, and of course, pornography on the Internet. Thus, many enjoy these pleasures while single, but, once married, suddenly all of those sexy images that turned us on... are now taken away. Once married the only sexy thoughts we should be having are about our spouse.

Many people go so far as to say that if you look at nude images or think about another person during sex when married then that is considered cheating.
Think about how unnatural all of those statements are, and in simple terms, over time, drive many people to "cheat" by watching porn behind their spouse's back.

When people do marry it is not supposed to be the end of looking at sexy pictures or thinking sexy thoughts or even controlling or suppressing the feeling of sleeping with another person. In fact, these feelings are completely natural. What is not natural is to suppress those feeling and shame a spouse for having them.

This does not mean that because we have those thoughts that we should act on them with another person, but simply understand them as a normal part of being human. Then, we can share those thoughts in the bedroom with our spouse (role-playing, fantasy, watching adult movies, erotic novels, sex toys...etc.) This will make the sex in the marriage all that much better and help to maintain a long-term monogamous relationship.

Marriage is not about suppression of sexual desire, but expression of sexual pleasure and freedom with the person who you love. A person with whom you can feel comfortable enough to explore your sexuality and not to be judged but embraced, that is what sex should be like in every marriage.

Knowing when it's time to leave a bad marriage

One of the most difficult parts about being a sex and marriage counselor is helping couples to get out of a bad marriage. 

At times people get stuck in their own situation and from the inside they are not able to see the misery that they are causing each another or the children that may be involved.

Leaving a marriage is one of the most difficult decisions that a person makes because it involves other people, and in some ways is the death of a relationship or a way of life.  The loss of a marriage can cause deep emotional pain on both a husband, wife and the children involved.

The real question is,
do you stay in a marriage that is making you a miserable person and everyone else around you for the fear that you may never find someone else or that you have failed your spouse and children?  The fear that you have just become another static in a world were commitment is no longer appreciated or treasured.

This is indeed a very personal matter and one that I believe should be looked at from all areas and come to a decision based on the well being of the entire family.  My job as a counselor sometimes is just that, to help a couple get out of a bad marriage and find a place where they can rebuild their lives again separately.

The one fact remains true and that is...... if two people have tried to stay together and worked on their marriage and keep failing ......making it a misery rather than a loving home, then the conclusion of those actions need to be measured and decided upon.

Life is about living not dying or living as a zombie without love or passion in a marriage, staying together for the sake of the children or the principal of marriage itself.

 For marriage and sex counseling

Erotic novel book review "Secrets" volume 10 by Dawn Michael

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Turn up the heat because this erotic novel is sizzling hot for women, couples and men. 
This is not a new novel but one that I sex counselor will recommend to my clients who may need a little help in spiceing up their sex life.  The book has four short stories in it and one of my favorites is the one call The Sacrifice by Kathryn Anne Doubois.  For any woman who needs to feel the desire again this is a wonderful book to heat up the passion in your own body.  The book can also be read to each other as a couple, including role play and teasing.

One expert form the book
"The Sacrifice"
The story is about Anastasia Bedovier a young lady who has taken vows of chastity to become a nun.  Before she denies her sensuality forever, she is taken to the Count Maxwells house of pleasure to test her strength of sexual desire.  She is shown scenes of lusty women with men and touched in places that no man has touched before, leaving her with thoughts and feeling that are of shame and pleasure mixed together.

To hear the chapter being read go to The Happy Spouse Adult Show blogtalkradio titled "mind sex"
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thehappyspouse

To have your book read for review contact Dawn Michael dawn@thehappyspouse.com

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The three silent killers that destroy marriage overtime

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Beyond the idea of love, friendship and even sexual intimacy, (which is one part of marriage.) there are three elements in a marriage that gradually over time may become a silent killer and lead to divorce.

The reason that these three elements become a silent killer in marriage is because they happen gradually overtime and without the married couple even realizing what is happening.

They are:

1.  A loss of respect for one another.

2.  No longer showing appreciation towards one another.

3. Showing little to no affection towards one another in the marriage.

The problem occurs as time goes by and married couples forget to nurture their marriage. Often times one assumes that those three elements are in place: Respect, appreciation and affection but surprisingly they no longer exist in the marriage. To understand that there is a problem to begin with is the first step towards fixing it. The next step is to bring the respect back into the marriage and appreciate the little things. Make an effort to show more affection towards your spouse.

To read more:
The three silent killers of marriage that may lead to divorce - Los Angeles Love and marriage Examiner.com

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